me

i have a weird memory. i'll forget the most important of dates and events but will remember the most weird and apparently banal things in life.

sometimes i feel like i'm too self-centered and obsessed with myself. i try really hard to come out of my shell but it doesn't happen that easily.

i'm a good listener. i can sit all day and listen to your troubles, issues and worries without judging you. but if i happen to find out the exact same things about you from someone else, it's hard for me not to be judgmental and opinionated.

i'm big on trust. mess with it once and i'll skin you alive, one layer at a time.

relaxed is what i am and that bothers the hell out of people. things that usually bother people, don't bother me. but there are things that really bug me and they make me say weird stuff to unsuspecting people.

i hate people who come to you for advice, hear what you have to say, tell you they agree with what you're saying and then go back and do the exact same thing you asked them not to do. hey, if you don't respect my thoughts, don't make me waste my breath!

i like well-kept hair, preferably black and relatively straight.

i'm a bit of a grammar freak. but i'll only correct people i like.

i take criticism very positively. give me a dose and you'll see.

i want to have friends around me, ALL the time. people i can trust and who trust me. people who i don't have to judge and who don't judge me. people with whom i can be ME.

the walls of my memory divide
the thorns from the roses
it's you who's closest

friendship - revisited

there are times you're aware of all of the good things around you. then there are times you start taking them for granted. then there are times that these things no longer move you till you actually lose them. never become oblivious to all the positives in your life.

a fleeting glance, a few unspoken words, a twitch in the eye, are enough to tell you the whole story. things are not always in your control and realization is the first step to acceptance. you've got to let them go while at the same time let them know that you're there. if you've never felt the exhilaration of such a feeling, you've never really had true friends!

thank you for always being there.

i saw an angel
of that i'm sure

serenity

lush green park surrounded by mountains, the moon leaves a faint glow on everything around you; cool breeze brushes your skin as you walk through a pebbled track. you keep your eyes focused on the path ahead but you can feel the presence of another person without actually looking. you keep on walking quietly as if you don't want to break out of this surreal trance.

cars whisk by and you can hear the remains of the water on the road as their tires splash through. people around you are looking but you're oblivious to all prying eyes. you walk on, maneuvering your way quietly through the damp patches.

you can feel her touch without any contact. you can sense her presence, hear her slow intake of breath with every step but you don't turn to look in fear of tripping. the absoluteness of her presence is enough for you.

kho ke apne par hi to usne urna seekha
jo bhi ho kal phir aaye ga

priority

sometimes you are just headed down a path without any sense of direction, as if on auto-pilot.

so you think you know all the answers...

if a line curves ever so slightly, invisible to the naked eye, does it still form a circle? if an act is harmful but doesn't hurt anyone, is it still bad? if you did something positive but no one reaped any benefits, is it still termed a good deed?

ye mera dewaanapan hai

the beat

[rhythm]

identity. monotonous.

[percussion]

blaring. loud. extravagant

[bass]

melody. style. beat.

observe your surroundings. get comfortable in your body. slowly sway to the tune.

start rising to the beat. close your eyes and focus. concentrate. reach for the clouds. float in the air. it's a dizzy yet surreal feeling.

hum dekhen gai

shattered glass

it's a tough ask to gather all the pieces and put them together but it's definitely not impossible. it all depends on your level of motivation. there's another option as well, you can just go and buy a new glass. now that is an interesting solution. why waste so much time and energy putting together something that is never going to be perfect? anyone who's close enough will see all the cracks that you've tried real hard to camouflage. you can be as meticulous as humanly possible but there's still going to be some imperfection!